14 years old and freshly in love or at 45 finally found true love: At some point, everyone faces the tricky question: how do you write a love letter? In 5 steps, everyone succeeds in writing a little masterpiece.
Where do I start? How do I find the right words? What must definitely go into it? And above all: what is the best way to write a love letter? Even William Shakespeare must have asked himself these questions when he wrote his first love letter.
Dear Juliet, dear Romeo, we’ll tell you the most important thing: great words are wonderful, but what counts is that you don’t pretend! Your love letter must be authentic, personal and from the heart. It should make a deep impression, touch you, express your feelings, stay in your memory forever, in short: be something really special.
You can get all the tools you need to write a beautiful love letter and important help here. 🙂
We say: the basic recipe for a beautiful love letter is no different than for any other really good text! The starting point for answering the question How do you write a love letter? is yourself: your creativity, your ideas, your personality, what makes you tick and what makes your love tick, spiced with a good pinch of honesty and romance.
Maybe you want to combine the handing over of the love letter with a special surprise or a special action? At Abenteuer Freundschaft you can find some romantic ideas for the home for couples that can serve as inspiration. But now back to the question:
Do you know the series Madmen? It’s about ingenious copywriting, catchy slogans – about copywriting in the advertising industry. Because in no other industry do you have to get to the heart of a matter with just the one right word. And that’s where the successful advertising fuzzies tell you about a great tool for the success of any text, which always comes first: brainstorming!
Brainstorming – that means, take a white sheet of paper and a pen, think of the beloved person and write, draw, scribble down everything that comes to your mind about the recipient of your love letter, about both of you and about your feelings. As unfiltered as possible, don’t think about it, just let everything flow out of you!
Put yourself in the right mood with suitable music – your song, for example. Or look at a picture of the person.
It just doesn’t flow by itself? Get going by reading the keywords as suggestions and start answering them. Then the next thought will come naturally.
In front of you is a big sheet of paper full of words and drawings. Congratulations! You have created the heart of your love letter! In front of you are a lot of different coloured rough diamonds that you just have to polish with words and a little bit of writing and design know-how. Before you do that, you first have to sort them out.
Use coloured markers or sort all your brainstormed words, thoughts, sentences and drawings thematically. Think of a suitable umbrella term for each topic (see the list of guiding questions below for help).
There are now a lot of words and drawings for each topic – these are all the most important topics, thoughts, feelings and words that go into your love letter, in short: the content.
Start your love letter with a personal salutation and make it as intimate as possible. Instead of the traditional “Dear/Love”, start with “dearest”, “sweet as honey”, “beautiful”, “dearly beloved”… If you are already in a romantic relationship, add “my” in front of it – this makes the salutation even more intimate.
Date your letter too – it’s a keepsake and sure to be kept forever and read over and over again!
When writing, there is a golden rule that says: the strongest goes at the beginning and the end. This means that you choose a very special topic from your content for the beginning that is particularly expressive: strong feelings, a very special experience that made you zoom, a crazy funny experience that you both laugh your heads off every time you think about it, something that is totally typical of your beloved and that you find crazy cute, etc.
But wait, the best has to come at the end, right? Exactly! The finale of your love letter should crown – or top – the whole thing off if possible. This is the perfect place for pet names and nicknames – and the biggest honest compliment you want to give! Alternatively, you can go into detail about your future or describe your feelings for the person in one sentence.
Sign your love letter with your name or pet name after a closing. The closing word should match your salutation – if you started by writing “My…”, end the letter with “Your…” You can make your closing emotional and passionate with phrases like “with eternal love”.
Your collected brainstormed words on the most important topics that move you are the framework of your love letter, which you now fill with words. You already know what you want to write at the beginning, in the body of your letter and at the end.
To link all the important things together elegantly and to create transitions, suitable anecdotes (brainstorming topic: experiences) and compliments (brainstorming topic: characteristics / appearance) are particularly good.
Your love letter should express exactly two things at first glance: it is one huge compliment and it expresses your affection through other small compliments you write in your love letter. Make sure you have a good balance of compliments about looks and character traits.
However, you should not overdo it and mean every compliment sincerely, otherwise your love letter can seem artificial and untrustworthy. And you want to avoid that at all costs. Remember: the more personal and individual a compliment is, the nicer it is.
So the rather stereotypical compliment: “Your hair is beautiful” will sound fake and punched, even though you might really like your sweetheart’s hair. But wrap it up in an original and personal phrase like “I love the way your hair looks dishevelled in the early morning when you’ve just woken up and are still half-asleep with your head sticking up from your pillow”. You’ve already made her/him smile! 😉
Don’t put pressure on yourself, take your time and just start writing. The most important thing is that you stay yourself, don’t pretend and say exactly what moves you and what you want to say with your words.
For those who find it difficult to write, it is tempting to use a template from the internet. There are really “perfect” love letters, impressive formulations and eloquent works of word art. Honestly, all of this is total bullshit!
You have written the best love letter you can write if you have managed to make exactly you shine through the words. Remember: the more authentic and unaffected the more honest and touching!
Write about your feelings, but don’t be over-emotional. And this is harder than you might think. Use your words to express how you feel. It is especially nice to describe feelings through comparison or metaphors. It is most beautiful when you find a comparison that is also personal. Use words to describe your feelings as images and bring them to life.
Great writers don’t need to write: “I love you” and everyone still knows immediately what the love letter is about because of the choice of words. For everyone else, however, this sentence should be written somewhere in your love letter.
A love letter is everything, but not ordinary! And that’s exactly what the entire love letter should express. Because the beloved person will keep this letter forever, touch it, feel it, put it under the pillow. And ideally still after decades! Be aware that this manifesto of your – your – love will be read and retrieved often! So it is worthwhile to show love in the design as well.
Choose high-quality stationery and a matching envelope to show that the letter is important to you and expresses value. You can find a wide selection of both in stationery shops or online.
And most importantly: write your love letter by hand! In these days of Whatsapp, smileys and half-sentences, a handwritten letter is something that many people hardly ever get anymore. Pure appreciation!
Typographically you can keep it as you like – but it should be legible and show that you have made an effort. This means, especially for the gentlemen of creation: make paragraphs, try to write nicely, avoid blotches and if you cross out words too often, rather write it cleanly again when the text stands.
Make sure that your text is centred on the stationery. This will prevent it from appearing too long if the last words are squeezed in or too short if ¾ of the paper is still free.
Choose a fountain pen with ink (do you know calligraphy?) or a pen that you can write well with. Ink always looks best, preferably in black or brown because we all associate blue, red and green with school somehow, don’t we?
You can draw well or just like to do it? Jackpot! Small drawings, cartoon characters, hearts or ornaments – design your love letter.
In the rococo period, aristocrats sent perfumed love letters, no joke! It’s actually not a bad idea to spray your love letter with your perfume, because after all, we know that memories are very strongly linked to smells. Especially if you don’t see your loved one for a while, it adds a special touch to your love letter.
You can also put something symbolic in the letter that perfectly matches a key moment of yours that you also mention in your love letter.
For example: Your first kiss was on a park bench in autumn under a maple tree? Put a pressed maple leaf in the letter.
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